Today my joints feel like they are on fire, it's been so hot and for some reason that has aggravated my already stiff and very sore bits. I find I am plotting and planning my routes and jobs in order to minimise the amount of time I'm on my feet and since February the thought of being stranded without my trusty (rusty) bicycle almost makes me break out into a cold sweat.....
I like to think that I'm a jolly person and that having arthritis doesn't stop me from doing things like being a mad aunt...
Getting flowers from fellas...
*whispers* these aren't from THE Fella but they are beautiful and far nicer than the person who gave them to me turned out to be in the end - that's another story!
I can cook, I love to cook! It's just that sometimes I can't because my hands hurt or because I'm just plain knackered out! Sometimes it takes me so long to prepare a meal that by the time I am ready to eat I am no longer hungry or interested in it. The fatigue element of arthritis is the part I'm finding hardest at this moment and I get sooooo frustrated at having to operate at less than half speed.
(please note - no grey lines round the yolks! I make brilliant scotch eggs....)
The things I can and can't do have been bought to the fore this week as I tackled (again) the 55 page DLA (Disability Living Allowance) form. I was turned down last time and didn't appeal as the rejection happened to coincide with a brief period of remission.
DLA would allow me to get someone to help me clean, getting down on my knees to clean the bathroom will mean extra pain for days after, wipe me out energy-wise and mean that I may not be able to do something else.....like work!
But how do you measure what you can and can't do?
I can write, here is a pic of Country Crafts on a German website! The German version has a different cover...smart innit?! The fact that sometimes I ache so much that I can't lift a copy of it with one hand is a little depressing though.
I can teach sewing machine skills and instill confidence in people, encouraging them to match, measure and cut fabrics but sometimes I can't even use a pair of scissors...
I can easily pick marigold heads from the allotment for dyeing workshops and yet find weeding almost impossible involving as it does a great deal of both kneeling and using my hands.
So how does one measure the impact of arthritis on a life?
I can't do some of the things I would love to do, like running - I last ran in January. I can't do some of the things I'm not that bothered about like cleaning....but I would like to live in a clean house again!
It would be nice to be able to choose to do things without having to work out what I will have to miss out later as sometimes cleaning the bathroom floor isn't worth missing a meal for!
I know I promised to blog about piles (and it ain't what you're thinking!) this time but they will have to wait...something else much more important came up.
Feet 7/10
Hands 9/10
I'm recording the scores for a week as I have an appointment with the rheumatology nurse next Wednesday.
Nx
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